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Her Highness’ CBD Pleasure Oil

 

I Tried Her Highness’ CBD Pleasure Oil and My Vagina Passed Away

Dearly beloved. We are gathered here to honor the life of my vagina, may she rest in power. For 26 years she graced the space betwixt my legs. She is deceased now, passed on by way of Her Highness CBD-infused Pleasure Oil. Her final moments were spent in a state of extreme ecstasy. She will be missed.

CBD products are everywhere right now. Working in cannabis media, I’ve found that they’re impossible to avoid. But more often than not, products will contain CBD as a marketing embellishment, not as an active medicinal ingredient. I’ve had my fair share of lackluster experiences with CBD wellness products that just don’t deliver. 

Not this time.

This experiment was originally conducted for scientific research purposes only. Fine, I guess I’ll stay home and masturbate all day, inconvenient as it may be, I said to myself. I wanted to discover the hoopla surrounding CBD on the hoo-hah. 

What I found was nothing. There is no solid evidence that CBD positively or negatively affects sexual pleasure. There are only personal testimonials. 

So, I decided to create my own. If I was going to devote my day to gathering data, I was going to be fully relaxed while doing so. On a work from home day, I closed the blinds, lit some candles, charged my rabbit, and used Her Highness Pleasure Oil to grease up like a sexy Tin Man.  

Here’s what happened:

  • Even before the climax, any part of me that made contact with the oil felt amazing

The oil itself is tea tree scented, and it made my body smell amazing. It tingles and warms your body on contact, so it even has some pre-orgasm relaxing properties. My fingers even felt the tingle. It all felt so good I could have stopped right there but–eh, who am I kidding.

  • I had a longer pleasure-sesh

I’m usually in-n-out type. Hit it and quit it. Let’s-get-this-over-with kind of gal. But nay. With this oil, I literally could have laid there till kingdom come and had been perfectly satisfied. I eventually snapped myself back to reality and remembered the science I was supposed to be focusing on. But the whole experience lasted around 15 minutes, which felt like an eternity for me.

  • My orgasm was so intense my vagina RIP’d

Long and strong, people, LONG AND STRONG. While my orgasms normally last around 10 seconds or so, this one lasted somewhere around 30 seconds. And by golly if it wasn’t extreme. My muscles were contracting so hard and fast that I think they accidentally kicked the bucket. Seriously, how does one recover from something like this?

I now use the pleasure oil with my partner and by my lonesome. When I use it with my partner, he feels an intensified sexual experience as well. I have a hard time having sex without it, it’s just not the same. Any way I use it is just as extreme and beautiful. 

Her Highness gave me the craziest orgasm of my modest little life. They should advertise some kind of warning label. Will have earth shattering orgasm, may induce psychosis. Honestly, I’m surprised I can still walk.

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What is a THC:CBD ratio

 

 

Here's a rule of thumb: The higher the CBD, the less of a high you'll get from the THC, both because there's less of it and CBD generally combats THC's psychoactive effects, depending on the amount of THC you've consumed, according to cannabis researchers and producers. 

When you're deciding which ratio is right for you, it'll take some experimenting. Both Hunter and Conner suggest starting with a high-level of CBD and working your way down to a more balanced product. You'll have to play around with the amount, too, but take it slow.  

Care by Design sells a sampler pack to help in the guessing game. The ends of the spectrum, 18:1 or 1:1, are its best sellers; either consumers don't want to feel psychoactive effects or they do, it seems. 

The trial and error, Bidwell said, is what happens when cannabis products rush into the market before there's sufficient research. 

There is, however, a prescription 1:1 CBD to THC mouth spray called Sativex made in the UK and available in several countries including Spain, Germany, Canada, and Brazil that's meant to treat spasms in MS patients. It's undergoing clinical trials in the U.S. Epidiolex, the first FDA-approved cannabis-derived drug in the states, is high in CBD with trace amounts of THC (not enough to have any pharmacological effect). It's used to treat seizures.

"We're starting to understand what CBD does, but even that is very minimal. And in terms of these different ratios, there's an idea or a hypothesis that there's something there in terms of THC facilitating CBD's action in a different way, if not more in different amounts. But in terms of the science being able to contribute to that in any kind of clear way, we're not there yet," Bidwell said.

Elliot Altman, biology director of the Tennessee Center for Botanical Medicine Research, disagrees with that assessment when it comes to CBD's therapeutic benefits. His lab at Middle Tennessee State University studies CBD and hemp. Marijuana isn't legal in Tennessee, but hemp is. Most CBD products are made from hemp extract, while the ratio products tend to include a variety of cannabis strains to get the right proportion.

It's clear to Altman, who does not study THC, that CBD provides relief for those with inflammatory or autoimmune conditions, but if you're looking for pain relief, that's going to come from THC. Altman's lab works with private groups looking to sell CBD from hemp as a nutritional supplement. 

"THC is for pain, and CBD is for when your immune system is compromised," Altman said. His take on these emerging products is pretty simple: "If what you're really after is CBD, but you're in a marijuana state, take a little THC to take the edge off, don’t take excessive THC." 

It's clear to Altman, who does not study THC, that CBD provides relief for those with inflammatory or autoimmune conditions, but if you're looking for pain relief, that's going to come from THC. Altman's lab works with private groups looking to sell CBD from hemp as a nutritional supplement. 

"THC is for pain, and CBD is for when your immune system is compromised," Altman said. His take on these emerging products is pretty simple: "If what you're really after is CBD, but you're in a marijuana state, take a little THC to take the edge off, don’t take excessive THC." 

The National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine put out a 2017 report surveying the scientific research done so far on the health impacts of cannabis. There is conclusive or substantial evidence that cannabis is effective in treating cancer patients with nausea, adults with chronic pain, and MS patients with spasms, according to the report. But, there's limited evidence that CBD can lessen anxiety and "no accepted standards exist to help guide individuals as they make choices regarding if, when, where, and how to use cannabis safely and, in regard to therapeutic uses, effectively." 

In addition to CBD:THC ratios, the U.S. cannabis community sees a bright future for hemp-only products. The 2018 Farm Bill, which passed Wednesday, will legalize industrial hemp on the federal level once signed by the president. There are many hemp products already being sold promising calm and pain relief.

"The CBD hemp business is gonna grow way bigger. Then marijuana will take over when it's federally legal," Conner, of Pure Ratios, predicted.

And the future may have even more numbers in store. 

Cannabis sellers forecast other lesser-known cannabis compounds like THCV, a possible appetite suppressant, may one day be included in ratios on packaging.

Hunter also sees powder packs of these products coming up the line — imagine Emergen-C, but with CBD. Care by Design's working on it. Coca Cola is also exploring the CBD beverage market

"Seems like every day or week we keep finding out more and more interesting information," Hunter said.

 

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What Ailments Qualify For Medical Cannabis in Connecticut?

The CBD Curators can refer qualified patients to local medical marijuana doctors.  Patients must document a qualified ailment.  

Patients in Connecticut diagnosed with one of the following severe, debilitating, or life-threatening medical conditions, are afforded legal protection under the Connecticut Medical Marijuana law, as per House Bill 5389.

For patients under the age of 18 years, the following conditions will effectively qualify:

Connecticut Medical Marijuana Program: Information

To Qualify for Connecticut’s Medical Marijuana Program:

  1. Patients must be 18 years of age. If under 18, Approved Caregiver must accompany and assist you throughout the process.
  2. Patients must be certified by their physician with a Qualifying Condition. (Must be certified before starting the registration process)
  3. Patients must create an account to access the online certification system.
  4. Submit application including your Authorized Caregiver (if applicable), Proof of Identity, Proof of Residency, Photo & $100.00 Application Fee (Caregiver Application is an addition $25.00). Department does not accept Cash Payment. If Mailing Documents, please send to Connecticut Department of Consumer Protection Medical Marijuana Program: 165 Capitol Ave, MS# 88MMP Hartford, CT 06106-1630.
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